|Dark Pit vs. Morrigan Aensland|
|Season 3, Episode 3|
|Air date||March 8th, 2015|
|Mami Tomoe vs. Vash the Stampede||Super Smash Bros. 64 Battle Royale|
Kid Icarus VS Darkstalkers! Which dark-winged anti-hero is superior?
Wiz: If the concept of a dark-winged anti-hero had a face, it would be one of these two. Dark Pit, the Pit clone-
Boomstick: And Morrigan Aensland, the, uh... wow she's hot.
Wiz: The Darkstalkers' succubus.
Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick!
Wiz: It is our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to see who would win in a Death Battle.
Wiz: Created from the Mirror of Truth, Dark Pit is a manifestation of the dark energy within Pit.
Boomstick: Dark Pit is sorta like 90's Pit. He's edgier, more serious about battle, thinks he's all that, and... the word "Dark" is in there.
Wiz: Despite what his name implies, Dark Pit is by no means evil. He's just abrasive. But besides that, Dark Pit has the same powers and abilities as Pit.
Boomstick: No WONDER he's just a clone in Smash Brothers.
Wiz: However, Dark Pit is more than just a simple clone. After defeating Pandora in battle, Dark Pit earned unlimited flight, something that Pit only wishes he could have. Dark Pit is also a weapons expert, having an uncanny knowledge of weapons that far surpasses Pit's.
Boomstick: Holy crap that's a lot of weapons! He has the First Blade, which is a blade that is best for beginners thanks to its all-around stats. The EZ Cannon is the same way, and he likes to spam the hell outta that.
Wiz: Dark Pit also has the Violet Palm, which wraps around his arm and fires powerful shots. Unfortunately, it has very low range. The Ogre Club fires pathetically weak shots but is absurdly powerful as a melee weapon. The Electroshock Arm causes paralysis, and just like Pit he has his very own set of Guardian Orbitars.
Boomstick: But his best weapons are the Silver Bow, which works just like Pit's Palutena Bow, except for some unexplained reason the shots get weaker as they go farther. Really?! But then there's the Dark Pit Staff, which is like a FUCKING SNIPER RIFLE! And badass enough to be named after him!
Wiz: Dark Pit is easily one of the greatest fighters in all of Kid Icarus. Unlike the jovial and well-natured Pit, Dark Pit is far more aggressive and pragmatic. Also unlike Pit, who is loyal to Palutena, Dark Pit is rather independent and works by himself.
Boomstick: He's actually kinda a (pronouncing it soon-dear) tsundere towards Pit.
Wiz: It's pronounced tsoon-day-ray, but yes. Dark Pit pretends he doesn't care about Pit or that he outright can't stand him, but really does care about him and has been known to even work alongside him. But that also might be because according to Viridi, he's not happy unless he's fighting.
Boomstick: And maaaan this guy can fight! He can fly as fast as Pit, which is pretty much hypersonic. He also has the same destructive capabilities as Pit, who was able to destroy entire cities. Dark Pit once took a beating from Pit and came out alright, and his reaction speed is faster than light.
Wiz: When Dark Pit isn't fighting, he's showing that he's very smart. Because he's a pragmatist, he tends to find out weaknesses and strategies while everyone else bum-rushes everything.
Boomstick: We're talkin' the guy who defeated Pandora and helped defeat Hades, and fought against Pit several times. Yeah, you don't fuck around with Dark Pit.
Wiz: But don't think for a second that Dark Pit is invincible. His cocky and arrogant side is very apparent when he is losing a battle, and while it is speculated that he has all of Pit's memories, whether he has all of Pit's battle experience is debatable. But still, Dark Pit is quite the powerful opponent and should never be underestimated.
Dark Pit: You've got me confused with the other guy. THIS Pit is no pawn.
Wiz: Born in the demonic realm of Makai and found by the demon Beliel, Morrigan Aensland was destined for amazing power.
Boomstick: Wow, she's hot.
Wiz: But Beliel feared Morrigan's power, and to compensate he split her soul in three, keeping one portion for himself, with the other half being sealed, finally becoming Lilith.
Boomstick: AKA, everyone's favorite hottie. Including mine.
Wiz: I'd say something about how sick that is, but no one really knows Lilith's age. Morrigan spent most of her days in the human realm, doing as she desired. This was pretty much limited to messing around with men.
Boomstick: ...She's hot.
Wiz: But it's not because of any reason you may be thinking of. You see, Morrigan is a succubus, which is a demon that slowly steals men's souls by preying on their sexual tendencies.
Boomstick: What do I care? At least I'd die happy, right?
Wiz: That's also not true. In the later days of soul-stealing, the victims of the succubus lose their minds completely. So you wouldn't even know she was preying on you. But the point is, Morrigan doesn't just do this because she likes to mess with men. She does this because it is crucial to her survival. If she does not feed in three days, she dies.
Boomstick: ...She's hot.
Wiz: Yes, we get it Boomstick. But her succubus powers don't just allow her to steal men's souls, they also give her many superhuman abilities. In Marvel vs. Capcom 3, Morrigan was able to fly faster than Iron Man. She can one-shot Huitzels, which are powerful demons, with single punches and kicks. And she is durable enough to survive freezing, burning, being hit with energy blasts, and even bisection.
Boomstick: She's into some really kinky stuff, isn't she? Man, that sounds like my kinda woman.
Wiz: Uh, Boomstick? She's preying on your sexual tendencies.
Boomstick: ...She's hot.
Wiz: Boomstick! No! Well, that aside, she also has superhuman reaction speed, she has prehensile hair capable of grabbing her foes, she can turn into a shadow and travel as a shade-like mist, travel between Makai and the human world effortlessly, and she only gets more powerful as she feeds, with no defined limit.
Boomstick: So she can give it and take it. I'm likin' this chick more and more.
Wiz: Don't fall for it, Boomstick!
Boomstick: Have you checked out this chick's wings? They can turn into just about anything she wants! They can extend as far as she wants, rip through robots and stone, and can even transform into cannons, jet boosters, missiles, and blades. And she can even remove her wings and turn them into bats.
Wiz: But what really makes Morrigan powerful is that after fusing with Lilith, she regained all the power that Beliel took from her. She is a master of a few soul-based techniques, including Soul Fist, which is an energy blast that is emitted from her fist to fight at long range. But her ace in the hole is a gigantic gun made from her wings known as the Soul Eraser. It is an extremely destructive force which could've destroyed all of Makai, and its name implies it can erase souls.
Boomstick: But she hardly needs it when she can take your soul... with a kiss.
Wiz: If it's all said and done and her male opponents aren't finished, she can end them with a kiss. While certain opponents like Demitri Maximoff were able to withstand the attack, if she maintains contact for too long then the opponent will give in to the kiss and eventually die.
Boomstick: And what a way to die.
Wiz: And that's after being born as an S Class Noble, defeating and fusing with Lilith, becoming queen of Makai and the Aensland family, and being considered to be one of the most powerful Darkstalkers.
Boomstick: And being super hot!
Wiz: Unfortunately, Morrigan is not without flaws of her own. She doesn't take fighting seriously, especially against male opponents. Some of her attacks may take a while to charge and she can be left wide open, she loses power if she doesn't feed, and once she lost a battle to Demitri Maximoff.
Boomstick: ...But she's hot.
Wiz: Boomstick! Stop looking at her! She'll take your soul!
Boomstick: It's too late, Wiz.
Wiz: No! Well, anyway, Morrigan's power and control over sexual tendencies may just be enough to take this battle home.
It was just a regular day in Makai, and the queen of the Aensland family, Morrigan Aensland, was minding her own business, watching the human realm from her house.
"Ah, humans, so much fun." Morrigan said with a grin.
But Makai had a new face around. The angel clone, Dark Pit, was on a mission of his own. Viridi had informed him of a demon with a power unlike anything anyone in Skyworld had seen. Dark Pit was intrigued, and wanted to take on this demon for himself.
"So this is where the demon Morrigan lives, huh?" Dark Pit asked, approaching her house.
Morrigan turned to hear Dark Pit from outside. She smiled as she heard a young man's voice, and then opened the door to see Dark Pit standing outside. Perfect. She thought to herself.
Dark Pit faced Morrigan and took a battle stance. "You better be careful, lady. I won't back just because you're a girl."
Morrigan grinned and gently ran her finger across Dark Pit's face. "Hush, boy. You don't want to fight me."
This upset Dark Pit a lot. "No one touches me!" Dark Pit said angrily. He drew his Silver Bow, and prepared for an attack.
Dark Pit slashed at Morrigan using the Silver Bow, and Morrigan jumped back to avoid the hit. Frustrated, Dark Pit fired an arrow at Morrigan, this time hitting her and knocking her back. In defense, Morrigan transformed into a shadow and disappeared.
"Where did that demon go?" asked Dark Pit, looking around himself. He felt Morrigan tap him on the shoulder, and he turned to strike at her. She wasn't there. He felt her tap on his other shoulder, and turned to strike again. Still, she wasn't there. "Alright, come out! Stop being a coward and fight!" Dark Pit angrily shouted.
"I'm right here." Morrigan playfully teased. She materialized in front of Dark Pit and punched him in the face, knocking him down to the ground. Dark Pit got back up and slashed at Morrigan across her midsection, then vertically across the face, and then slashed her several more times quickly. He finished the combo with a hit from the Ogre Club, knocking her into the sky.
The succubus, now at long range, did a punching motion. A bright yellow energy blast shaped like a fist emerged and fired towards Dark Pit. "Soul Punch!" she called. Dark Pit raised his Guardian Orbitars in defense, and the Soul Punch redirected towards Morrigan. Morrigan quickly dodged her own attack and flew down towards Dark Pit. She delivered a kick into his upper section, then extended her wings into blades. She slashed at Dark Pit several times with her wings, until Dark Pit blocked an attack with his Silver Bow. The two exchanged blows for a few seconds, each time blocking each other.
Instead of continuing the slash-block-slash cycle that he and Morrigan were in, Dark Pit hit her with the Electroshock Arm. "Electroshock!" Dark Pit shouted. Morrigan was sent flying, covered in blue sparks of electricity. Dark Pit pulled out the EZ Cannon and fired an explosive blast at Morrigan. The succubus was sent even higher into the air, and Dark Pit flew up to catch up with her.
Now in mid-air, Dark Pit continued slashing at Morrigan with his Silver Bow, never once allowing her a chance to escape. He flew back and equipped the Violet Palm, and he began to charge up a shot as his arm started to glow a bright violet. But then he saw that Morrigan wasn't fighting back. Instead, she was giving him a sad puppy-dog face.
"Oh, you don't want to hurt ME, do you?" she asked, tilting her head and seductively moving her body. Dark Pit's arm dulled, and he suddenly stopped attacking. "I didn't want to get hurt. I just thought we were having fun."
What is she doing?! Dark Pit thought. What am I doing... I just went up and attacked her for no reason... even I'm not that bloodthirsty. In the midst of Dark Pit's thinking, Morrigan shot missiles out of her wings at Dark Pit. Before Dark Pit could even react, he was hit by the missiles, which exploded and sent him hurdling towards the ground.
Why do I feel slower now?! Dark Pit asked himself. This doesn't make sense... With Morrigan at a distance, Dark Pit was able to think more clearly. He pulled out his signature Dark Pit Staff, and took aim at Morrigan while charging the staff. Before he could even fire, Morrigan was in front of him again. She slashed at him using her wings again, and then sent him flying into the air.
"You're so cute." Morrigan teased Dark Pit. Her wings turned into a giant cannon, and then she fired a bright white beam at Dark Pit. "Soul Eraser!" she shouted. Upon contact, there was a large explosion in the air. She giggled and grinned as the attack connected, but her grin faded quickly as she saw that Dark Pit had the Guardian Orbitars up the whole time.
"I can't fight her at close range." Dark Pit deduced. "I'll need to keep a distance." Dark Pit continued charging up the Dark Pit staff, while Morrigan turned into a shadow again. "Not this again." Dark Pit looked around some more, waiting for Morrigan to strike. She appeared right behind him and grabbed hold of his shoulder. Knowing what he had to do, Dark Pit fired the Dark Pit Staff at Morrigan, whom was right behind him.
Dark Pit grinned as he didn't see Morrigan behind him. He couldn't even feel her anymore. "Hmph. Serves you right, you little slut."
"Slut? Oh no, such a cruel word."
Shocked, Dark Pit turned around. He saw Morrigan suddenly behind him, somehow okay. "What?! But-"
"Silly boy." Morrigan said with a grin. She grabbed Dark Pit and then flew towards the ground with him, pinning him onto the ground.
"Stop! What are you doing?!" Dark Pit tried to resist.
Morrigan smiled at the angel clone. "Hush. It's alright now." She pressed her face against Dark Pit, kissing him on the lips. Dark Pit squirmed and tried to resist, but he could only feel himself getting weaker. He could not lift her off of him. A few seconds later, Dark Pit's skin began to get more and more pale. After a few more seconds, Dark Pit could not move, and was completely petrified. Morrigan got up and stood victorious.
"Aw, did I kill you? How sad."
Boomstick: Personally, if I were Dark Pit I wouldn't be complaining right now.
Wiz: Anyway... this battle seemed close at first. Dark Pit's varied arsenal countered Morrigan's many years of experience, and his bloodlust was far superior to Morrigan's playful fighting style.
Boomstick: However, Morrigan is a succubus, and succubi literally have the power to drain men of their energy.
Wiz: As Morrigan charmed Dark Pit, she would get more powerful. Once Dark Pit began to fall under Morrigan's influences, he stood little chance in the long run.
Boomstick: But Wiz! His weapons could've killed Morrigan!
Wiz: While he theoretically could've killed Morrigan with the Dark Pit Staff, she is a very fast flier and her dimensional travel and shadow forms allowed her to avoid any of Dark Pit's attacks. And while Dark Pit held the speed advantage, Morrigan's charms made sure he'd slow down.
Boomstick: Morrigan sealed Dark Pit's fate... with a kiss.
Wiz: The winner is Morrigan.