Boomstick: For as long as man has lost limbs, they have looked at the stumps and said "I should replace that with some badass metal shit!"!
Wiz: And these two are a perfect example of that. Brought back from near death through the wonders of science, they have become literal killing machines.
Boomstick: Franky, the SUPER shipwright of the Straw Hat Pirates.
Wiz: And Cyborg, the...cyborg superhero of the Justice League.
Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick.
Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor and skills to find out who would win...a DEATH BATTLE.
Wiz: Water 7. A slowly sinking city that was dying due to pirates raiding the supply ships needed for their survival.
Boomstick: Until the fishman Tom arrived with a dream. He would build a train that ran ON WATER to save Water 7 from becoming a ghost town. ...and he actually did it!
Wiz: Not by himself, of course. He had help from his two shipwright apprentices Iceburg...
Boomstick: Wait wait wait. His name is Iceburg? A shipwright named after something that's known for causing shipwrecks?! Remind me to never buy ships from that guy...
Wiz: You don't even buy ships. When you go fishing you do it in an empty beer barrel carrying a bazooka.. Anyways, Tom's other apprentice was Cutty Flam.
Boomstick: Wait, what the hell is he wearing?
Wiz: Cutty Flam was a skilled young shipwright, making 35 small battleships he named the Battle Frankies. Which would later backfire when those same battleships were stolen and used to frame Tom and his apprentices for attacking the city.
Boomstick: Yeah, turns out that Tom had the blueprints for an ancient warship named Pluton which the government really wanted, but he refused to give it to them.
Wiz: In the end, Tom sacrificed himself to let Cutty Flam and Iceburg walk free, being taken on the very same Sea Train he made with his own hands to be executed.
Boomstick: So Cutty Flam ran onto the train tracks to stop the train with his own body! It went well.
*shows Cutty Flam run over by the train*
Wiz: Considering the fact that he actually survived and managed to build himself a new body with parts from a nearby warship, yes, it went far better than it logically should have! Cutty Flam died that day, reborn as the cyborg known as Franky.
*Franky's theme plays*
Boomstick: You know, that outfit actually looks more ridiculous on him when he's like that. At least he's got some swim briefs to cover up-OH MY GOD NO!
*shows when Franky's swim briefs were stolen*
Wiz: Anyways, Franky's modifications gave him greatly increased strength and durability. Even when running low on power, he is strong enough to stop a charging elephant right in its tracks.
Boomstick: And he usually puts that strength to use with various boxing and wrestling techniques.
Wiz: He is also an extremely skilled craftsman, to the point where he can build an ornately designed bridge out of rubble in less than 30 seconds.
Boomstick: And he only got better when he found the old laboratory of the super scientist Dr. Vegapunk! And blew it up!
Wiz: Using the technology there, he was able to improve his body even further, becoming even stronger and getting new weapons. He can blast his opponents with Weapons Left, fire his hand like a grappling hook with Strong Right, fly using Coup de Boo...
Boomstick: And when he needs an extra bit of firepower, he can fire a powerful exploding laser beam from his hands!
Wiz: In addition to his strength and weaponry, Franky is a tank...
*shows the Franky Tank*
Wiz: ...in two ways, it seems. His metal skin is tough enough to deflect bullets, but it has one fatal weakness: his back is entirely exposed! As Franky made all his modifications himself, he couldn't reach behind him to modify his back. Still, for a weak point Franky is undeniably tough even there. When he fought Senor Pink...
Boomstick: Wait, what the hell is HE wearing?!
Wiz: ...the fight turned into a duel of manliness, where both sides would take the full force of the other's attack to see who fell first. Senor Pink realized Franky's weakness and subjected him to multiple suplexes, finishing with a massive one that involved sending both parties high into the air!
*Wiz does some Wiz math do figure out the exact distance Franky and Senor Pink fell*
Boomstick: And Franky got up and won the duel!
Wiz: Indeed. And if he ever needs even more defense, he can bring out the Iron Pirate "Franky Shogun", his piloted mech.
Boomstick: Now we're talking! Equipped with a giant sword, this badass robot is even more destructive and harder to kill than Franky himself. It even has a Captain America shield!
Wiz: Still, Franky has another thing limiting his ability to last in a fight: his fuel source is three bottles of cola!
Boomstick: Wait, he's powered by Coke? Can I become a beer-powered cyborg?
Wiz: Other forms for drink can also be used as a fuel source, but will greatly change his personality. While he can still move without cola, he's greatly weakened and can't use most of his special moves.
Boomstick: But still, the mechanized pirate is one shipwright you do not want to mess with.