Description[]
This is Bobawins What-if Death Battle Season 1 Ep. 5.
Scott Pilgrim vs Pokemon
Interlude[]
Boomstck: Everybody's favorite guilty pleasure vs Everybody's favorite guilty pleasure. So that way, when one of them dies, you have to go and cry in the bathroom.
Wiz: Not really, but close enough.
Boomstick: Hey, I don't judge.
Wiz: I'm Wiz, and he's Boomstick, and it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to see who would win... A DEATH BATTLE!!!
Scott Pilgrim[]
Wiz: In Toronto, Canada, a kid named Scott is born--
Boomstick (Talking Fast): And he grows up and gets a bunch of powers and gets a 17 year old girlfriend named Chau, and Scott's 23 years old, and he finds this girl called Ramona Flowers, and he really likes her, so he cheats on Chau, and starts dating Ramona, and beats her 7 evil exes, and they live happily ever after.
Wiz: Ahem... Spoiler Alert
Boomstick: You're welcome.
Cue Music: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=exKi8HWHcpI
Wiz: So let's talk about his powers.
Boomstick: Scott's move set pays omage to the Street Fighter Series. He can do the Shoryuken, and even Air Juggle which is a move which he throws someone in the air and punches him multiple times.
Wiz: He is also capable of earning special powers that are metaphors for what he's really fighting for.
Boomstick: The Power of Self Respect, which is a power that Scott activated when he was fighting for himself. This is almost like a power up of some sorts for him.
Wiz: He is also able to unlock The Power of Love, which is a power that Scott activated when he said he was fighting for Ramona.
Boomstick: And The Power of Understanding, which is the final weapon that Scott unlocks. This gives him a sword that resembles Cloud Strife's sword from the Final Fantasy series.
Wiz: This is when he realized that Gideon, the guy he was fighting, was no better than him at being a boyfriend.
Boomstick: And it comes with an awesome T-Shirt!
Wiz: Scott has also achieved Super-Human powers, such as Durability, and Strength.
Boomstick: One time he got thrown high into the atmosphere by one of Ramona's evil exes, who just happened to be Vegan, and fell back down to the ground alive. Is it just me, or are Vegans Super-Human?
Wiz: Apparently.
Boomstick: And he was able to destroy 3 robots with relative ease.
Wiz: Scott Pilgrim is ready for any obstacle in his way.
Scott: I sort of feel like I'm on drugs when I'm with you. Not that I do drugs. Unless you do drugs, then I do drugs all the time....
Ash Ketchum[]
Cue Music: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C-naZCJD8i8
Boomstick: Ash Ketchum, the Ten year old kid that hasn't aged since the 1990's. Seriously, he's still Ten!
Wiz: To make the fight more fair, Ash will only have four of his Pokemon.
Boomstick: Pikachu, Charizard, and Snorlax.
Wiz: Ash grew up in Pallet Town, and has always been thriving to be a Pokemon Master. When he turned Ten years old, he was old enough to start training. So he quit school, and dedicated his life to training Pokemon.
Boomstick: Whoa! He quit school? Damn, Ash is a bad boy!
Wiz: The day before he went to Professor Oak's Lab, to get his first Pokemon, he thought it would be a good idea to watch a bunch of Pokemon Tournaments before going to sleep. As a consequence, he was late to the Professor's Lab.
Boomstick: All three starter Pokemon were already taken, but there was one more Pokemon for Ash..... AN ANNOYING ASS PIKACHU THAT GETS ON EVERYBODY'S NERVES!
Wiz: But Ash eventually trained this Pikachu to be a very good Pokemon. In fact, it actually turned out to be a special Pikachu.
Boomstick: Enough backstory, let's get to the Pokemon's powers!
Wiz: Let's start with Pikachu.
Pikachu[]
Cue Music: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gWTZbEbv2gs
Boomstick: Let's just get this over with already.
Wiz: Pikachu has multiple different electric attacks. We're limiting each Pokemon to only four moves, because that's exactly how many you can have at a time in the game.
Boomstick: One of his most famous attacks, Thunder Shock is a move where he shocks his opponent with a huge bolt of lightning.
Wiz: This move deals about 40 damage, but it is still very powerful.
Boomstick: One time, Pikachu took out a whole flock of Spearows with one Thunder Shock.
Wiz: Then there's Agility, a move that lets him move around quickly, and dodge attacks.
Boomstick: Another move is Volt Tackle, where Pikachu dashes at his enemy at a higher speed because of the lightning surrounding him.
Wiz: And his last move is Iron Tail, which makes his Tail, you guessed it, iron, which makes it significantly stronger.
Boomstick: Onto the next Pokemon!
Charizard[]
Wiz: Charizard is one of the few of Ash's Pokemon he got in the Indigo League, and has kept ever since.
Boomstick: Which makes sense, because this Pokemon is powerful.
Wiz: Charizard's first move is Flamethrower. For this move, Charizard engulfs his enemies in flames. This move deals a fair amount of damage, but not a lot.
Boomstick: Then there's Seismic Toss, a move where Charizard grabs an opponent, flies up into the atmosphere, and throws them down to the ground.
Wiz: There's also Take-Down, where Charizard flies up into the air, and plunges down on his opponent.
Boomstick: And last but not least, Dragon Breath. For this move, Charizard breathes a beam of fire at his opponents.
Wiz: Charizard still has one very important disadvantage... He's lazy.
Boomstick: Poor Ash. Charizard literally lost him the Pokemon League on PURPOSE.
Wiz: Well, in the end, Charizard is still pretty awesome.
Boomstick: True.
Wiz: Onto the last Pokemon!
Snorlax[]
Boomstick: Speaking of Laziness, I present to you, Snorlax.
Wiz: This Pokemon Proves that Brawn is over Brains
Boomstick: Let's start off with Body Slam. For this move, Snorlax pretty much falls on top of the enemy. And I bet it hurts like hell!
Wiz: His second move is Tackle, where Snorlax lunges at his opponent hits them.
Boomstick: Then there's Mega Kick. In this move, Snorlax kicks his opponent.... That's pretty much it for that move.
Wiz: Mega Kick was once used on Team Rocket, and they took the hit easier than most of the ones they get.
Boomstick: And finally, Rest. Ummm.... This move... Wiz? I need help here.
Wiz: Rest can be used if Snorlax is low on health. It helps him heal faster.
Boomstick: Ok, that's it. Phew!
Ash: Right now, I kinda wish that my mom named me Bob instead of Ash.
Pre-Fight[]
Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set, let's end this debate once and for all.
Boomstick: IT'S TIME FOR A DEATH BATTLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Fight!!![]
Cue Music: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fzVxXxzqvaM
Ash is walking on a path with Misty and Brock.
Ash: Alright guys, is it back to Pallet Town?
Brock: Sure, why not?
Scott: Oh, you're not going anywhere!
Misty and Brock reach for their Poke Balls but Ash interrupts them.
Ash: This is my fight.
Misty: But you only have 3 Pokemon! The rest have fainted!
Ash: Misty, I can handle myself with 3 Pokemon.
Scott: Don't get too cocky.
Ash: BRING IT ON!
FIGHT!!
Cue Music: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2Jmty_NiaXc
Ash: Go Pikachu!
Ash lets Pikachu off of his shoulder.
Scott: What is this thing?
Pikachu: Pika Pi!
Ash: Pikachu, use Volt Tackle!
Scott: That thing understands english?
Pikachu charges toward Scott.
Scott: Uh oh.
Scott does a backflip over Pikachu.
Scott: This little mouse is a feisty one!
Ash: Pikachu, use Thunder Shock!
Pikachu: PIKAAAA CHUUUUUU!!!
Scott gets shocked by the lightning
Scott: Alright, I'm gonna come out of here alive. For Ramona.
Video Game Announcer: Scott earned The Power of Love!
Ash: Pikachu, use agility!
Scott dashes up to Pikachu and jabs at him with the sword, but keeps missing.
Video Game Announcer: Smarts +1
Ash: Pikachu, use-- OW!
Scott had punched Ash in the stomach.
Pikachu: Pika?
While Pikachu is distracted, Scott runs up to Pikachu and slices him with the sword.
Scott: Yes!
Video Game Announcer: Pikachu Fainted!
Coins fall on the floor, and Scott collects them.
Scott: Cool, coins!
Ash: Damn it.
Scott: What? Is that all you got?
Ash: Actually, no. Go Charizard!
Cue Music: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4GC1ra3c7FM
Ash throws the Poke Ball and Charizard comes out.
Scott: Now, that's more like it!
Ash: Charizard, use Flamethrower!
Charizard: ROAR!
Charizard uses Flamethrower on Scott.
Scott: Can we go back to the little yellow mouse?
Scott's sword disintegrates.
Ash: Had enough already?
Scott: No. I'm better than this. I'm fighting for MYSELF!
Video Game Announcer: Scott earned The Power of Self Respect.
Ash: Charizard, use Takedown!
Charizard flies up in the air and plunges down towards Scott.
Scott: SHORYUKEN!
Scott countered the attack by using Shoryuken.
Ash (Thinking): Maybe I should save Charizard for later.
Ash: That's enough, Charizard! Go Snorlax!
Cue Music: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=00YI0OlQQ6s
Scott: Oh my god...
Ash: Snorlax, use Body Slam!
Snorlax: SNOR!
Scott: OH GOD NO!!!!
Snorlax falls on top of Scott.
Scott: MPHH!! MPH!
Ash: Yeah! Great job, Snorlax!
Snorlax: Lax...
Ash starts to laugh. But that ends quickly, because Snorlax goes flying up in the air.
Snorlax: SNOOOOOOORRRR (Fading away)
Scott: I'm full of surprises.
Ash: SNORLAX! USE REST!!!
Snorlax falls asleep.
Ash: Well, he'll be falling back down any minute now.
Gary Oak happens to walk by them.
Gary: Ash Ketchum! I challenge you to a Pokemon Bat-- MPHH!! MPH!
Snorlax falls down on Gary.
Ash: Snorlax, wake up!
Snorlax: Snor...
Gary: Next time, Ash.... next time....
Scott: Who's that?
Ash: You don't wanna know.
Scott: Ok then...
Ash: Snorlax, use Mega Kick!
Snorlax: Snorrrr... LAX!!
Snorlax kicked Scott into a tree.
Scott: Alright. That's enough.
Ash: Snorlax, use Tackle!
Snorlax uses Tackle on Scott.
Scott: Well, apparently, that's not enough.
Ash: Snorlax,... keep using tackle!
Scott takes out his sword of Self Respect, and quickly dodges Snorlax's tackle, sneaks up behind Snorlax, and cuts him in half.
Video Game Announcer: Snorlax fainted!
More coins fall on the floor.
Scott: Awesome!
Ash: Alright, GIVE IT YOUR ALL, CHARIZARD!
Cue Music: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YEZ9LTIdQj0
Scott: Again?
Charizard: ROAR!!!
Ash: Charizard, use Seismic Toss!
Charizard goes up to Scott, picks him up, and flies up into the atmosphere.
Scott: Please don't hurt me...
Charizard throws him to the ground.
Scott: AHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! Oof!.... Ow....
Ash: Charizard, use Dragon breath!
Charizard shrugs, and lays down.
Ash: ARE YOU SERIOUS, CHARIZARD?!?
Charizard yawns.
Ash: (Sigh)
Scott: I can understand that. When someone just doesn't care about the situation at hand. Only about themselves. And that, is why I have to beat you.
Video Game Announcer: Scott earned The Power of Understanding!
Scott runs up to Charizard and cuts him in half.
Video Game Announcer: Charizard Fainted!
Ash: I don't need Pokemon to kill you!
Scott: Yeah, keep dreaming, boy.
Scott stabs Ash. Everything goes white. Music stops.
Ash: Where am I?
Scott: You're dead.
Ash: Wait, wouldn't that mean you're dead too?
Scott: No. I'm just here to tell you that you're screwed.
Ash: Well, what do I do?
Scott: Get a life.
Ash: Is that metaphorical or literal?
Scott: Both. You can either stay here forever, or make the right choice, and stop abusing animals.
Ash: What are you, PETA?
Scott: Actually, yes.
(Crowd Gasps)
M. Night Shyamalan: What a twist!
Ash: What was that?
Scott: I have no idea.
Ash: Well, I might as well live.
Video Game Announcer: Ash got a life!
Ash wakes up in his bedroom. The TV's on, and he's watching Pokemon Tournaments.
Ash's Mom: Ash! Go to sleep! You'll be late tomorrow!
Ash: Actually, I don't want to be a Pokemon master anymore.
Ash's Mom: Ok, suit yourself.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GD6qtc2_AQA
This Message was brought to you by PETA.
Results[]
Boomstick: Ok... What the hell just happened?
Wiz: Yeah, that's not in the script.
Boomstick: Here's the real ending.
The Real Ending[]
Scott: Keep dreaming, Boy.
Scott stabs Ash.
KO!!!
Real Results[]
Boomstick: Holy Crap! That was freaking AWESOME!!!
Wiz: Even though this was an extremely close battle, Scott overpowers all three Pokemon in different ways.
Boomstick: Even though Pikachu's attacks are strong and quick, Scott is much bigger, and stronger than Pikachu in melee combat.
Wiz: Even though Charizard was bigger, could fly, and is stronger than him, Scott is smarter, and was durable to Charizard's attacks.
Boomstick: And Charizard was too lazy to just finish the job. Even when Scott was an easy target, and was in severe pain, he still didn't want to do it.
Wiz: And Snorlax. Snorlax is much bigger, and stronger, but Scott is smarter, faster, and has the Power of Self Respect.
Boomstick: Finally, Ash can't defend himself without Pokemon. Even though he thinks he can.
Wiz: The winner is Scott Pilgrim!
Next Time[]
Boba Fett is next!!!
