(Please note: The Wario being used is standard Wario. Nothing from the WarioWare games will be used.)
Super Mario Vs. Mortal Kombat! Which strong, fat and gassy combatant will come out alive in a fight to the death?
Scorchmark: Being fat is not something that is a common thing in most fighters, after all, you've got to at least move fast in order to fight!
Ripple: But is that really the case? Are there some benefits to being fat in terms of combat?
Scorchmark: Well, these two fighters can certainly prove that there are!
Ripple: Wario, Mario's greedy arch-rival from the Mario series.
Scorchmark: And Bo' Rai Cho, the drunken martial artist expert from Mortal Kombat!
Ripple: He's Scorchmark and I'm Ripple.
Scorchmark: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor and skills to see who would win in a Death Battle!
Scorchmark: Do you know a video game character that has a moustache, wears overalls and a cap that has the first letter of his name on it?
Ripple: If you were thinking about Mario then you're wrong! It's his arch-rival, Wario!
Scorchmark: Wario was once Mario's friend as a child but he felt like he was being treated unfairly, he turned his back against him.
Ripple: Since then, Wario has always hated Mario. He even went as far as to try and take over his castle once but Mario emerged triumphant, as always.
Scorchmark: Wario has developed an unhealthy obsession with wealth and these days, spends most of his time searching for treasure. He is not unprepared for any dangers that may head his way though.
Ripple: He may be fat, but Wario is no pushover. He possesses immense strength that allows him to break bricks with his shoulders. He can also lift rather heavy objects that the average human would have trouble with.
Scorchmark: Wario also has a ground pound that is very destructive. It can shatter stone floors and can also shake large buildings such as castles!
Ripple: Wario can also enlarge his mouth so wide that a fully grown human can fit inside!
Scorchmark: So you'd best make sure he doesn't close it while you're stuck inside, or it's gonna hurt!
Ripple: Strength may be one thing but durability is another! Wario has survived being crushed, burned, electrocuted and much more! He has even been turned into a zombie and a vampire before, yet still managed to change back to normal!
Scorchmark: Probably the most deadly weapon in Wario's arsenal is...his gas.
Ripple: That's right! Wario' farts have such an explosive force to them that they can launch him into the air and deal massive damage!
Scorchmark: There's just one thing though, it takes time for Wario to produce such devastating farts. If he tries to let a big on rip until then, it will not be as bad.
Ripple: For a guy this strong, it makes you wonder why he doesn't take up wrestling.
Scorchmark: I guess he just wants to spend his time trying to get his hands on money without getting a job!
Bo' Rai Cho
Scorchmark: We're not doing the guessing game this time. Let's just get things over with. Have you heard of the famous Mortal Kombat characters Liu Kang and Kung Lao? We won't be analyzing either of them.
Ripple: No. Instead, we will be taking a look at the guy who trained them! Say hello to Bo' Rai Cho!
Scorchmark: While he was born in Outworld, Bo' Rai Cho has gone on to become an expert martial artist that is well known and respect. However, he trains warriors from Earthrrealm.
Ripple: First of all, how can a fat drunkard like him become an expert in martial arts?
Scorchmark: That's a good question. Bo' Rai Cho uses a martial art style called the Drunken Fist. It is said that he was the one who invented it.
Ripple: So what exactly can he do?
Scorchmark: As stated, Bo' Rai Cho is highly skilled in martial arts, so when it comes to a good old fist fight, it is pretty darn difficult to best him. He also uses a kane as a melee weapon and can create earthquakes by stomping on the ground.
Ripple: He also uses his body weight to his advantage. Bo' Rai Cho can bounce on his opponent to inflict damage. He is so heavy that he can sometimes completely flatten his adversary in the process!
Scorchmark: Don't forget his Belly Bash, where he rushes foward and slams into the opponent with his belly. The impact of this attack is so hard, it is able to leave the target in a bloody mess.
Ripple: Now we are getting to the gritty bits.
Scorchmark: You said it! Because Bo' Rai Cho gets drunk often, he has a habit of puking and farting. As disgusting as they sound, they do have their uses.
Ripple: Bo' Rai Cho can use his puke in order to make his opponent slip. His farts, on the other hand, can temporary stun them.
Scorchmark: He also uses a torch to light both, his farts and his alcoholic breath on fire!
Ripple: OK, I think I've changed my mind. He isn't as harmless as I thought!
Scorchmark: That's right! Bo' Rai Cho may seem like a drunken old fool, but he is not to be underestimated!
Scorchmark: Alright, the combatants are set, let's end this debate once and for all!
Ripple: IT'S TIME FOR A DEATH BATTLE!!!
It was a rainy day at the temple. Several warriors were patrolling the outside area and so far, everything was looking fine.
One of the warriors noticed something in the distance. It turned out to be a plane. At first, it seemed harmless, but then things got troublesome as the plane changed course and flew towards the temple.
The warriors banded together and got ready to fend off whatever dangers might come near the temple, but it was futile. The plane crashed, knocking them all out.
Amongst the plane wreck, someone jumped out and brushed the soot off of himself.
It was Wario.
Wario: Wah hah hah!
He entered the temple and took out some more warriors with ease. He then started searching the rooms until he finally found what he was looking for.
Inside one of the rooms was a pile of treasure. Wario's eyes turned into coins.
Wario ran towards the pile and was just about ready to dive in.
???: Greed can only get you so far.
Wario stopped. He turned around to see Bo' Rai Cho taking a swig from his jug.
Wario: Who are you?!
Bo' Rai Cho wiped his mouth
Bo' Rai Cho: I could ask you the same question.
Wario: I am Wario! I am the greatest!
Bo' Rai Cho: I don't think the best person in the world would resort to thievery, now leave!
Wario grew angry and impatient.
Wario: This treasure is mine! How about you leave?
Bo' Rai Cho entered his fighting stance.
Bo' Rai Cho: Then I'm afraid I'll have to make you leave myself.
Wario: You think you can beat me? Bring it, loser!
Wario immediately ran at Bo' Rai Cho and tried to hit him with a few punches but Bo' Rai Cho easily managed to block and dodge all the attacks. He then kicked Wario when he had the chance and landed a combo of punches on him. The last punch sent him flying into the wall. Wario bounced off the wall and landed on his face.
Bo' Rai Cho: Your technique is lacking!
Wario pulled himself off the ground.
Wario charged at Bo' Rai Cho with his shoulder, who tried to block the incoming attack, but the impact caused him to stagger. Wario then punched and kicked Bo' Rai Cho while landing an occasional headbutt until one of his punches was blocked by Bo' Rai Cho's kane.
Bo' Rai Cho: I see you haven't witnessed my true power yet!
Bo' Rai Cho whacked Wario around with his kane for a while. Wario grew sick of the assault and grabbed the kane as it came down. He then snatched it out of Bo' Rai Cho's hands and snapped it in half.
Wario: Ha ha!
Wario was able to ram into Bo' Rai Cho and stun him. He then grabbed the drunkard by the feet and swung him around. As he let go, Bo' Rai Cho went flying out the door of the room and tumbled across the floor. Wario ran out to meet him and started shaking his butt towards his opponent.
Bo' Rai Cho: Quit being so arrogant, fool! I'm not done yet!
Wario ran at Bo' Rai Cho, ready to hit him with another shoulder charge. However, Bo' Rai Cho threw up all over the floor int front of Wario and he slipped as his feet touched the puke. Bo' Rai Cho then performed a Belly Bash and slammed into Wario with his belly.
Wario: Waah! I'll get you!
Wario leaped right in front of Bo' Rai Cho and attempted to pummel him, but Bo' Rai Cho farted before he could and Wario started coughing giving the martial artist the chance to knock Wario to the ground. He then jumped into he air and bounced on Wario with his belly.
Wario: I'v had enough of this!
Bo' Rai Cho: I can't get enough!
Bo' Rai Cho was just about to punch Wario when he ended up missing somehow and tripped. He then found himself inside Wario's mouth.
Bo' Rai Cho: What is the meaning of this?
Wario: I'm gonna crush you!
Wario began chomping on Bo' Rai Cho as the drunkard struggled to escape. Wario eventually spat him out. Wario then picked up Bo' Rai Cho and proceeded to punch him until he was kicked away.
Wario: You still think you can beat me?
Bo' Rai Cho: Very positive!
Wario tried to get in close but Bo' Rai Cho performed some Monkey Flips and hit Wario multiple times. He then pulled of a large uppercut that sent Wario flying through the ceiling. Wario landed on the roof of the temple and got up to see Bo' Rai Cho already there to continue the fight.
Bo' Rai Cho: I grow quite weary of this. I'll end you as quick as I can!
Wario: Just try!
Wario lifted a large stone statue nearby and threw it at Bo' Rai Cho, who got hit by it directly and fell down. He was then picked up by Wario who slammed him with his butt. Bo' Rai Cho was knocked back against a pillar.
Wario: I win!
Bo' Rai Cho: I'll never lose to you!
Bo' Rai Cho got up and stomped on the ground, creating a small earthquake that caused Wario to stumble. Bo' Rai Cho then jumped up and crushed Wario beneath his feet. Wario got up slowly and that was when Bo' Rai Cho saw his chance.
He got out his torch, lit it and held it to his rear while bending over.
Bo' Rai Cho: You put up a good fight, but you're nowhere near my level. Goodbye!
Bo' Rai Cho let out a massive fart. It sent the flames towards Wario and engulfed him.
Wario was running around covered in flames while Bo' Rai Cho was waving his hand in front of his nose.
Bo' Rai Cho: Oh ho hoh! That's a stinky one!
He got ready to leave.
Wario: You call that stinky?
Bo' Rai Cho looked back to see Wario covered in cinders. He then shook them off to reveal that he was perfectly fine.
Bo' Rai Cho: How?
Wario: I'll show you stinky!
Wario ran forward and knocked Bo' Rai Cho to the ground. He then bent over with his butt facing his foe.
Wario: Get a whiff of this!
Wario let out a fully charged Wario waft. Bo' Rai Cho was blown back and was knocked through a few pillars. He then tumbled across the floor. As soon as he stopped, he saw Wario jump into the air.
Wario: So long!
Wario performed a massive ground pound, crushing Bo' Rai Cho into a bloody pulp.
- Wario is seen walking away from the temple with a sack full of treasure.
- Bo' Rai Cho's remains are seen with the word FATALITY! in he foreground.
Scorchmark: Sorry Bo' Rai Cho! Looks like your years of experience in martial arts wasn't enough to prepare you for Wario!
Ripple: Bo' Rai Cho may have the advantage when it comes to skill, but in every other department, Wario thwarts him by a mile!
Scorchmark: Wario is far stronger than Bo Rai Cho could ever hope to be. Bo' Rai Cho can flatten people by jumping on them with his belly but come on! Shaking an entire castle with a ground pound!? That's a different story.
Ripple: Wario is also much more durable. He has survived lots of things that would kill an average human. He has been set on fire numerous times and survived each time without a burn or a scratch! Simply put, there was nothing Bo' Rai Cho could have done to put him down for good.
Scorchmark: Being a mighty warrior may mean you're a great fighter, but it's nothing compared to the mighty Wario!
Ripple: The Winner is Wario.
They fight for justice...
They fight for what is right...
They ride on vehicles...